For the past few evenings, my husband and I have turned off the TV to talk about our faith journeys, our marriage and our precious baby Isaac on the way. I brought up my pent up frustrations with my own success and potential. For those that know me, I’ve always said “you’re going to see my name in lights someday.” I still believe that will one day come true.
But the frustration comes from not knowing God’s purpose for the gifts and talents He’s given me. I want to be used by Him to do something great. I can’t deny that I have a resume of professional capacities that some could see as great. But for the hungry ambition that continues to boil within me, none of it has been great enough. But that’s by my own standards, and perhaps that’s where I’m going wrong. I’m realizing to do great and to be great, it’s NOT about ME! I’ve mentioned time and again, it’s about everyone I can help along the way.
Mary Kay believed women can enrich themselves by enriching others. In my independently owned business, I cannot get to the top without bringing someone up there with me. The efforts of generosity and philanthropy in the Mary Kay world should never be underestimated. I LOVE MK’s ideology and will ensure it thrives within my business acumen.
But I sadly admit to my husband, Mary Kay is not how I want to see myself succeed on this unprecedented level ‘m reaching for. I’m still searching for the way God will use this special gift He’s given me.
I am NOT complacent, and I pray I never will be. I believe complacency breeds an idle mind. Complacency is detrimental in any work environment or voluntary effort. I’ve mentioned my husband and I are involved in helping the church he grew up in. This church community is predominately Filipino-based. It’s a blessing to be surrounded by my cultural roots, but it’s also a hindrance.
I am PROUD to be a Filipina, but I’m NOT proud of Filipinos. It’s a sad and harsh fact to realize. Time and time again, I’ve been surrounded by this sense of complacency. It’s almost as if I’ve been raised to work to get by rather than work hard to achieve more. When I was juggling my more than full-time job at Mark Cuban Co’s while working my Mary Kay business, my mom told me I shouldn’t be working so hard. That conversation will NEVER escape me. I couldn’t believe how she chose to show her concern for my well-being. Then looking back over my life, I’ve been raised in the same mindset. Work to get you by, but don’t work your tail off if it’s not necessary. I was encouraged to use my talents to get me by but was never pushed to take it to the next level. Thanks to my upbringing, I never saw my true potential realized in several instances. I didn’t know to choose to live otherwise. Complacency got me nowhere!
Back to the church, I was in a rather troubling discussion with other members who happen to be of Filipino descent. In a conversation about building a new church, I was appalled by the reactions of other members. People stepped up to admit they haven’t done enough in their assigned roles. But they were sure to say they have a will to help and they want to be used to do God’s work. Well that’s only half of the battle!
It’s great they have a will to donate their time and efforts, but something else is keeping them from achieving more. They’re so complacent in their excuses. Some had said they cannot do more because they don’t know how to do more. Some had even said they blame their cultural upbringing on their hindrance to achieve more. I heard excuses like, “In the Philippines, we were never raised to help lead the church. We were just raised to attend church and we relied on the nameless few to run the business of our place of worship.” With that sense of complacency, they never cared to step up and figure out how they can do more to help. So now, they rest their laurels on that cultural ideology.
I see within our group there is a will to help the church now but no ambition to further their service out of their cultural comfort zone. Now please don’t misunderstand me. I’m not putting my own culture down. I’m sharing this brutally harsh observation in hopes that it will create change or some form of motivation to get out of the depths of complacency.
Then I look at myself and what I’ve achieved or have yet to succeed in. I’ve been the exact same way! I did what it took to get me by in Mary Kay, but I didn’t push myself to achieve so much more that was within my grasp. I didn’t choose to achieve more. I was comfortable with the accolades, the money and the recognition. But I wasn’t comfortable enough to do the uncomfortable to get me to super-stardom level in my own business. I’m completely disgusted with myself! I have the choice to enrich myself by enriching others, yet I have stumbled into my own sense of complacency.
But here is what sets me apart from the many complacent Filipinos. I know I have a God-given gift to share with others. I know my life is not my own to control and if I continually ask Him to guide me in the right direction, I will be used to my fullest potential to achieve what so many are willing to seek but not willing to do the hard work for. I have several ongoing projects and plans that I pray will come to fruition if in His plan for me. It will be a bumpy road and only my faith and perseverance can pull me through. I have to stop myself from just getting by and really push myself to do what’s uncomfortable for now.
It’s easy to set goals and to dream big. It’s even easier to make excuses as to why that dream has to be put on hold. I cannot be scared to step up and do the work that seems unnatural. I must rise to the challenge but cannot rely on myself to get the job done. It is Christ who strengthens me in all things and it is Christ who will never lead me astray. As long as I seek Him for guidance, my own perseverance will kick in. I just may surprise myself (and everyone around me) that I am capable of achieving so much more.
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