Our days are numbered

Another great devotional message from Our Daily Bread was shared with me by my very wise husband. He reminds me that our time on earth is limited. I will not live a life of complacency by having the mindset that making changes in my life is something to put off until I'm nearing the end of my life. I do NOT believe that is the way to live because the time is now.



"Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom. —Psalm 90:12

In an effort to number my days, I ask myself the following questions:

How can I become more like Christ?
Am I reading the Word regularly?
Am I devoting time to prayer?
Am I meeting together with other believers?

I know God put me here to do something great with the talents and passion He's given me. But my time to do great and to be great is limited and dictated by HIM. So I will live this life with a heart open to His love and wisdom to not just spend my time, but more importantly, to invest it.

Patriotism

Below is an excerpt from Mark Cuban's thoughts on becoming wealthy. I care to do my part in patriotism.

“Being rich is a good thing. Not just in the obvious sense of benefiting you and your family, but in the broader sense. Profits are not a zero sum game. The more you make the more of a financial impact you can have.” (Mark Cuban)

I’m taking my multiple streams of income to: give back to God’s church for His blessings; to give to the less fortunate in the community; and to boost sales for the Neiman Marcus children’s department. Seriously!

Make more so you can give more, and remember to always give back to the ONE who gave it to you. Our economy needs a boost. Let’s show some love to our great country in the form of our hard-earned money!

Postpartum Pounds Part 2

When Isaac was born, I weighed 182 lbs. GASP! Before Isaac was conceived, I weighed 130 pounds. Since my last postpartum poundage report over four months ago, I have lost 13 pounds living life as a stay-at-home mom with absolutely NO dieting and NO exercising. That may not sound like much of a loss, but considering my current lifestyle, I'm quite proud of myself. I spend 85% of my time indoors at home eating everything in sight. The intense food cravings still haunt me at all hours of the day/night. Right now my biggest cravings are for peanut M&M’s and In-N-Out burgers and fries. Since I refrain from ordering a Double-Double-Animal-style, am I considered health-conscious? Does carrying around a gigantic baby count as a workout regimen? If so, then clearly it’s no mystery as to why I’ve trimmed down and am only 9lbs away from my goal weight! Haha!



In all seriousness, I owe the steady weight loss to the past 7 months of breastfeeding my baby. Sometimes I feel like I deserve some sort of recognition at this point. My son’s first two bottom teeth are in…yowza...they really hurt!

I’m a HUGE advocate for breastMILK. I encourage soon-to-be moms to breastfeed your child. Breast is the best and your shrinking post-baby figure will love you for it!

My life is in you, Lord

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Make me a channel of your peace.
Where there is hatred let me bring your
love.
Where there is injury, your pardon, Lord
And where there's doubt, true faith in
you.

These are shortened versions of the prayers I have lifted up to the Almighty Father throughout my life. (I cannot take credit for these empowering words.)

It takes dedication to say them on a daily basis. It takes conviction to trust God’s plan rather than my own. It takes wisdom greater than my understanding to accept life as it is. It’s not about being the best me I can be. It’s about living life pleasing Him and no one else. I think that is the hardest part of all, but I accept the challenge.

Gossip Girl

Some gossip came back to me not too long ago when a good friend confided in me. She said a particular woman in our greater community recently talked about my past mistakes to her family. My friend and I couldn’t believe that after all these years this particular woman had to drudge up the hurtful past.

When the rumor mill churns salacious drama, I admit there is an eerie satisfaction when hearsay pulls people down from their glorified pedestals. But that’s so wrong, and I cannot let my sinful nature find pleasure when he-said-she-said-this-and–that.

Although this woman cannot get past the past, I know I have. I worship a God of second chances and I love who I am today because of HIS promise to me. As long as I make a conscious effort to maintain dignity and remain Christ-like in any given situation, I know I will be blessed.

I’m thankful to my husband who is always so encouraging. He taught me how to look at the situation with greater wisdom rather than let it bring me down. He challenged me to let this one slide. In the grand scheme of things, it shouldn’t affect my personal values nor can I let it stand in the way of my potential. God has blessed me abundantly, and with this wisdom I grow stronger and become better everyday.

Financial Responsibility

My husband and I have been financially responsible over the past few years. We understand that the money we earn is not ours. As Christians, we believe that God blessed us with financial privileges in the form of our multiple streams of income. But above all, we believe a portion of what we earn goes back in glory to Him. We always tithe to the church. In other words, we follow a biblically fundamental financial discipline in which at least 10% of income earned every month goes directly to the church…sometimes more but definitely no less. We pay the church first before our savings, before our bills, and before ourselves.

You know what is truly amazing about this practice? When we put God’s church before any other financial obligation, we never find ourselves in financial trouble. HE always helps us make ends meet. HE always provides what we need and in most cases, HE gives us more than we ask for. I’m not preaching the prosperity gospel nor do I guarantee God will bless you if you decide to give money to His church. I’m just saying that we give what is expected of us and walk by faith. Even when our eyes can’t see what is to come, our hearts trust that He will always come through whenever we need.

It's All a Test

I believe life happens in God’s time. I’m now at a point where He’s blessing me with several opportunities to once again pursue some “dream jobs.” His timing is impeccable with His blessings. Now that Isaac is a little older, God is blessing me with a chance to find myself professionally with three big-time opportunities. It’s so exciting but overwhelming at the same time.

Within the past two weeks, I’ve been asked to use my talents and interest in sales and promotions for a local TV personality and wedding planning extraordinaire. Also, a former NFL player has asked me to help share his unique sports marketing concept to potential investors. Lastly, a former colleague has personally referred me for a position that demands my marketing/sales background to counsel non-profits in their fundraising efforts. These opportunities combined are basically what I’ve been searching for these past two years since I retired myself out of the corporate world. If I were to fully commit myself to any one, I think I might find great reward and fulfillment. But here is the catch…I believe these are all a test and so far, I’m not sure I can pass.

God has blessed my husband I with this beautiful, healthy baby boy. I’m a mother now and always will be…first and foremost. I would rather NOT put any other J-O-B in front of my motherly and wifely responsibilities. Just the other day I was feeding my son. Instead of cherishing the moment as another intimate bonding experience with him, I was more concerned about the business emails I had to write. At that time, I didn’t see anything wrong with being preoccupied in that sense.

I shared that incident with my husband, and praise God that I did although it was hard for me to admit to him. But my husband got me to see that being preoccupied with anything other than my nursing child at that very moment puts other “priorities” before baby. I didn’t realize that at that moment I was not being a mom first and foremost. So now here I am blogging with insomnia about that painful realization.

For just over three years, I had the dream job working in sports and entertainment. I chose to let that job take over my life. I let that job come over my marriage and family. I managed to make that job my life. As hindsight is always 20-20, I will be first to admit what a horribly self-centered and arrogant person I was when working at that job. It wasn’t my job’s fault. It was my choice to do it all for myself and no one else. Geez, I hate admitting that.

My baby boy is over five months old, and I’m approaching the last few months of breastfeeding. God willing, my plan is to exclusively breastfeed at least another two to three months. Motherhood has been amazing with all of the challenges and triumphs I’ve experienced with this phenomenal child. But with all of these opportunities to take my professional career to the next level, He is testing me to see what matters more, success in business or success in motherhood?

In my mind and in my heart, baby comes first. But in recent situations, that doesn’t seem to be consistent. So now I’m taking the time to do a lot of soul searching and praying. God always sends me signs and I know to ask Him to lead the way. I’m being the best mom I know how to be while realizing there is always room for improvement. I always question everything yet deny the solutions that are best. I LOVE being a mom, but can I be appreciative of the privilege I have to stay at home and raise my child? It’s definitely a test to see where my priorities truly are.

My sphere of influence part 2

I believe that whatever personal growth I achieve will be the product of my spiritual life, my home life, and my social life. So I must continue to make wise decisions in how and with whom I spend my time with.

I’ve reached out to several women and included those that intimidate me. Just being around these women forces me out of my comfort level. They push me to improve in the areas I know I’m performing subpar. With the help of their positive influence, I hope to become a more devout Christ-follower, a more loving and submissive wife, a more nurturing mother, a more strategic businesswoman, and/or a stronger woman of influence to those around me.

I plan to host my first women’s get together in the next week or so. I’ve only begun with my outreach. I hope this list of empowering women continues to grow. I’m blessed to know so many amazing and successful women. But for now, I am testing the waters with a select few and with every intention to reach out to the masses…God willing.

My sphere of influence

In an effort to use my time wisely, I had this random thought to reach out to some female friends who have made an impact on me personally and professionally. I'm trying to organize scheduled meet-ups for us all to discuss our triumphs, our tragedies, our concerns, and our doubts as we work towards our personal and career goals. I look to these women as a source of inspiration and motivation. Hopefully I can be the same for someone else. Each of the women I've approached meet the following criteria:

1. They are ambitious and/or influential among their peers.
2. They push me to achieve my personal best.
3. They are all gifted with talents and abilities.
4. We have worked together in some capacity.

I once heard somewhere that a wise person talks about ideas whereas a foolish person talks about people. Keeping this in mind, I don’t care to gather in a group of women and gossip. To me it’s a useless way to spend my precious time and it’s downright mean to slander someone behind his or her back. I’ve gained some perspective on this, as I’ve been the subject of floating rumors in certain social groups.

I prefer to surround myself with people who have big dreams and are the epitome of perseverance. I’m selective in how I spend my spare time since being a wife and mom keeps me plenty busy. I believe that if I’m to succeed in anything, I’ll need inspiration, support, and understanding from people who get what I’m trying to accomplish. And hopefully I can help or inspire someone else in her climb to success. So we’ll see how the first meeting goes. Until then, I’m learning to look at life more positively and constructively and encouragement from other like-minded individuals will surely give me a boost.

Are you depressed?

I heard a wonderful message in a sermon delivered by Pastor Ed Young, Jr. of Fellowship Church. He spoke about an emotional condition that affects so many people. For those of you who may be experiencing bouts of depression, heed these words.

The number one cure for depression is to go out into the world, find someone in need and help them. It’s as simple as that.

I believe that in doing so, you will find long-lasting fulfillment and joy in your life. Please consider offering a helping hand to someone in need. Not only will you feel good about putting someone else first, you’re also doing your part as God expects each one of us to do. When you give back you give glory to Him.

I have the most amazing readers!

There are several readers of this blog that have shared with me who they are. And I’m flattered. I can only pray that my anonymous readership grows with each post. I want to take a moment to say thank you to each and everyone of you that made the effort to write me your thoughts, your feedback, your words of comfort, and your praises. I have received text messages, emails, facebook messages, and out-of-the-blue phone calls from people I never imagined would care to read what I have to share. Each time I get a reaffirming message about particular blog entries, my heart soars.

I began this blog during one of the most trying times in my life. To be honest, I began this blog when my marriage hit rock bottom and certain people in my life decided to walk away at such a crucial time. If you revert back to my very first post and get further into it about a year ago exactly, you may realize I have endured a tumultuous era in my adult life. I knew no other way than to tackle my personal defeats in a creative form of therapy. In pursuit of self-discovery within my own spirituality and faith in Christ, blogging was an outlet to very publicly share how I overcome trials and how prayer has changed me for the better.

I began this blog on a positive note. I wanted to encourage readers to never be complacent especially when it comes to your spiritual relationship with Christ. Behind every one of my rants and raves, I intended to praise people to success despite the improbable hardships. I hope it’s understood that I believe people should never settle for anything less than their personal best in any capacity. I receive confirmation from readers that my attempt to be as sweetly honest with my innermost thoughts is productive. So to everyone who cares to read what’s in my heart, I thank you and appreciate you more than you know. Thank you for your confirmation. Thank you for your encouragement. Thank you for your sympathy. Thank you for caring.

Postpartum Pounds

This weekend was an emotional roller coaster for me. I had extreme highs after having experienced my first Mother’s Day. Then there were the moments I fell too deep into my own self-loathing insecurities. My husband did everything he could to cheer me up, but I decided it was never enough. It’s hideous of me to let my heart and emotions come down so low. After all, I’m blessed with so much: good health, a happy home, a loving marriage, and a beautiful baby boy. But believe it or not, my heart is still a volatile mess of emotions.

Right now, my biggest internal conflict is my postpartum weight issues. This blog is intended to share the sweet honesty of the reality I face. So here it goes…I currently weigh a whopping 152 lbs! I have NEVER weighed more than 130lbs on even my most bloated and miserable days, pre-pregnancy that is. My hips, thighs, and junk in this trunk are of gargantuan proportions. When I look in the mirror, I tell myself I look disgusting!

I’m blessed to have had a speedy metabolism and lean physique for all of my life. Then, I had a big baby boy and let my sweet cravings get the best of me. I did not discipline myself as much as I hoped to throughout the pregnancy and/or postpartum days. Granted, I am breastfeeding and my baby needs my calories. So dieting is not an option at the moment, but I digress. I caught myself looking into the mirror in a fitting room trying clothes that were my size but looked unflattering and straight up not hot at all! I’m a mom, and I ain’t tryin' to dress all hot to get attention. But I want to feel good wearing clothes that make me feel confident in this new body. I ain’t about to invest in “mom jeans!” I will do whatever it takes to avoid denim until I’m at my ideal weight. I already have this sluggish mom body and I refuse to give in to a less than flattering wardrobe just because I now have childbearing hips. In all seriousness, when it comes to my physique, it’s so hard to accept me for me at this present time.

My husband has been there for me, cheering me on with every pound I lose. He compliments me when I make the effort to do my hair. He tells baby that he has a beautiful mommy. Never once has my husband given me any reason to believe I’m physically disgusting. These dreadfully negative thoughts are all self-inflicted. And it’s now getting to the point where my negative opinions are superior to what anyone else says.

I can’t just say “thank you” when my husband says I look pretty. I’ve become so negative to the point where I allow my own perception of my physique to come before anything meaningful in life. I can’t look past the reality of having had a baby. I feel disgusting and in a sickly twisted way, I tell myself my feelings of disgust are the absolute truth. But it’s not the truth at all!

My husband has been my guidance counselor throughout postpartum. He got me to realize that these unreasonably self-centered, superficial insecurities about my outward appearance were once again letting the evil seep in. It’s another spiritual battle. Why would the “evil one” want me to be happy with all that I’m blessed with? Why would the “evil one” want me to recognize God’s greatest gift…my baby boy? Why would the “evil one” want me to be so spiritually high that nothing else matters? These questions all boil down to one simple truth. The “evil one” will work ‘round the clock to interfere with my recognition of God’s grace, His mercy, and His love. The “evil one” wants me to believe that it’s right to drown in self-hatred when it comes to my self-perception. When I obsess over my insecurities, the “evil one” wins.

It wasn’t until my husband and I had talked did I realized my dissatisfaction is crippling my spiritual well being. I’ve given in to the one sin from which all other sins arise…PRIDE. What is truly hideous is that I’ve become so engrossed in vanity.

Now is the time to get myself out of this rut. I must let go of the negativity that consumes me and hold firm to what is real and true. I should start by accepting the sweet compliments my husband gives me. Am I really disgusting? No! Do I have any reason to be unhappy with what I’ve been given? Heck no! I must squash any insignificant thoughts. It’s now up to me to let it all go and let God continue to work His way in my heart and into my mind.

Before I continue berating myself for my current full figure, I must understand my vanity is a sinful practice and no good can come of it. Not only is it rude to ignore compliments from my sweet husband, but it's also damaging to my personal worth and well being. What's the point of hating how I look? What am I really trying to prove? My self-worth cannot be measured by looks alone. It's time to be humbled and it's time to grow up. Looks aren't everything and placing my happiness/sadness on appearance is bulls!@#. Whenever my superficiality gets in the way of my happiness, all I have to do is take one good look at this beautiful, healthy baby boy that God gave me. Then nothing else will matter.

The Royal Wedding Part 2

I am humbled by the verses in scripture the royal couple has chosen to be read during the ceremony. I’ve picked out powerful verses and listed them below. These words stand out and remind me why I married the God-fearing man who has chosen to remain in this marriage for better and for worse.

"Let love be genuine. Hate what is evil. Serve the Lord. Persevere in prayer. Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Live peaceably with all." (Romans 12:9-21)


In my heart of hearts, I believe my marriage will be forever if and only if we remain steadfast and true to these biblical standards. With all that my husband and I have endured and enjoyed, I have faith our marriage will be blessed by God as long as we choose to remain in this together.

In marriage, we must each grow into the man and woman God intended us to be. As long as we help each other spiritually, then an unending love will surely be.

The Royal Wedding

I woke up to feed the baby at 5:45 this morning and was thrilled to see live coverage of the royal wedding. It was magical and so romantic in its dignity and traditional honor. Kate Middleton did her own makeup on her wedding day. I admire her integrity in that she wanted to most closely resemble herself on her wedding as the girl Prince William fell in love with.



I was more of a traditional bride on my big day. I was not over the top nor was I too simple. I felt like a princess adorned in my hand-sown veil and satin white gown.



I went for simple elegance and remained emphatic yet poised throughout the nuptial mass service and evening reception. My hair was down with loose curls and partly pulled back. I wanted to look like myself and not terribly made up. I did have a talented makeup artist for my wedding day. She was the best in her craft. She created a naturally flawless look accentuating my facial features. She did an incredible job complementing what God gave me. I have never felt more beautiful than on my wedding day. That’s how every bride should feel on her wedding day. Whether royalty or not, every blushing bride is a princess bride.

The only two things that we did that strayed away from the conventional were the father-daughter dance and our surprise tribute to our friends and family. Again our wedding day was such a joyous occasion. We partied the night away and put on a show for our beloved in attendance. We created a moment both my husband and I will forever remember and hopefully for those who were there will also never forget.





Now please don't get me wrong. I'm not trying to compare myself to the incomparable Kate Middleton, but I wanted to share just how special simple elegance can be for a blushing bride on her big day. To you ladies who are about to be married, I believe you will look your best by looking most like your everyday beautiful selves. Basque in the honorable beauty embodied in the nuptial ceremony. Remain poised and confident throughout. After all is said and done, you will look back truly cherishing every fleeting moment when all eyes are on you and yours will be on the perfect man you're going to marry.

Peace be with you

In her Lenten devotional blog post, my dear friend reminded me of a simple and necessary effort. How sweet and simple it is that we share peace with those that we love. During mass, the congregation spreads peace to each other prior to receiving the Holy Eucharist. With a neighborly handshake, we greet our friends, families and nearby strangers warmly by expressing, “peace be with you.”

Mass is a time of prayerful meditation for me. During mass, I am most peaceful in mind and in my heart. Although I conjure up my troubles and temptations or joys and praises, my soul is uplifted knowing that His house is my peaceful sanctuary. I talk to God anytime and everyday but of course, it’s so different while kneeling in my pew.

I realize the necessity of peaceful acceptance with the hand I’ve been dealt. Peace can come in the form of accepting my current life situation. It can also come in the form of accepting a broken relationship. But I feel the most rewarding and daunting attempt could be peace in the form of forgiveness.

Sharing peace with others can be a silent effort in your heart when lifted up in prayer. Only God knows what’s truly in your heart when it comes to others. Only God will judge your true intentions and knowing this, I’m reminded of the power of prayer. I keep telling myself that prayer doesn’t change God’s perfect plan. Prayer changes me.

I’ve recently come face to face with former friends. As a result of past mistakes made between myself and another guilty party, certain people have publicly and privately turned their backs on our friendship in one way or another. It was bound to happen that these former friends and I would one day meet again. To my surprise, our anticipated reunion was completely peaceful. I didn’t get the silent treatment and thankfully it wasn’t too awkward. I somehow found it in me to genuinely smile and lovingly embrace a particular individual despite the reality we now face of no longer being “friends.”

Although I was the one who initiated communication after so many months of creative avoidance, I believe the peace I found in my heart to approach her was God working His way in and through me. God’s perfect plan was to let each of us go our separate ways despite that pride was the overriding reason. But my prayers to Him helped me change who I once was towards her. The encounter could have been dramatic and unproductive if we let prideful unrest get the best of it. But again, I dug deep within my soul to offer peace despite the past. For me, this peace was beautiful and transcendent. In this peace, I found acceptance of our current friendship status (or lack thereof). In this acceptance I found closure and contentment.
At this point I would have it no other way, and I praise God for how it all turned out in the end.

As I sit and think about friends who have come and gone and those who have withstood the test of time, to each of them I bring peace. As I would do in church, I offer each of them peace in the silent form of prayer, acceptance and forgiveness for whatever will be will be.

“Peace I give to you, my friends…my friends
And I will love you ‘til the end.”

I'm a mom!

I haven’t posted an entry in quite some time. Obviously, I’ve had much bigger priorities on my plate. I’m blessed to share that Isaac Neil Ignacio was born on Monday, Feb. 14th at 3pm. Isaac was born at a healthy weight of 8lbs 12 oz. He’s a big beautiful baby boy!



Scheduling a last-minute cesarean delivery definitely had its tradeoffs. It’s remarkable to realize my amazing doctor safely delivered my baby in about 15minutes. But recovery has been slow and at times quite painful. I am forever grateful to God for giving me my helpful family and friends and my ever so helpful husband. He definitely played Mr. Mom while I lay helplessly in bed for the first few weeks after bringing home baby. My husband went above and beyond in every aspect for mom and baby.



My baby boy is nearly 7 weeks old and I still pinch myself every time I look at him. Am I really a mom? Am I really his mom? Is this beautiful baby really mine? Motherhood is quite a concept to fathom. I praise God for the motherly instincts He designed to kick in on demand. I never knew I had it in me to be a mom, but I apparently was cut out for this amazing gig.

But I must admit that while it’s been heavenly bliss raising this baby, I’ve had my tumultuous spats of postpartum depression. It’s hard to admit this, but there were times I was completely miserable, angry, frustrated and helpless when it came to sustaining the life of my newborn. I am going on seven weeks of breastfeeding. The first three weeks were absolute hell. Bloody scabs, a fever coupled with an infection welcomed me to the wonderful world of breastfeeding. Not to mention, I was recovering from major surgery. The first few weeks were the biggest challenge I have ever faced physically and emotionally.

Although my husband and I were ecstatic to have this healthy baby, we got into some of the most vicious arguments. My postpartum depression involved emotionally berating my husband with hurtful words. Each time he lovingly tried to pacify my frustrations, I became enraged. In one particular instance, he attempted to calm me down with good intention. He said, “We’re in this together.” I lashed out hatefully saying, “No, I’m all by myself on this!”

That retort crushed my husband. To him, it was demeaning, hurtful and made him feel like a useless counterpart in our early stages of parenthood. Sadly, I meant to hurt him because at that intense moment I truly felt ALONE. He had no idea what it was like to nurse a child while recovering from surgery while managing heightened emotions. My self-inflicted negativity brought about jealousy and envy towards my beloved husband. I was so jealous that he didn’t have to go through the torture of child birth and breastfeeding. I was so jealous that it was only me feeling the agonizing pain after my body had been surgically mangled to bring about this new life. I was so jealous that he didn’t have to go through anything physically and that he could do nothing to take the pain away. I was a jealous beast…and although I could completely blame it on postpartum depression, there truly was more to it.

Being the strong Christian believer that he is, my husband would routinely remind me that every postpartum internal conflict I lost was another victory for the evil one. He made me realize that postpartum depression is not clinical…it’s spiritual. He believes these symptoms were a psychosomatic manifestation of a spiritual battle. He would remind me not to let the devil in…not to let the devil win.

Did I listen? Not at first. It was hard to. I was in too much pain to get out of my heart and into my head. But as humility would demand of me, I had to deny everything negative about each conflict. I didn’t want to constantly face defeat for the sake of my marriage and for the sake of my precious baby. When I felt distressed, the baby could feel my stress. I hated that. So I decided to forcefully shake off the postpartum depression symptoms as best as I could. I’m only human so naturally I would weaken here and there. But it took everything in me (along with my God-fearing husband) to realize that I wasn’t fighting myself on this…I was fighting the lesser of powers, aka, the evil one. Note to self -- it’s spiritual, not personal.

Now after nearly seven weeks of being a mom, things have truly taken a turn for the better. I’m excited to share that both baby and I have mastered breastfeeding and it’s virtually painless. Yes, there is hope for you soon-to-be-breastfeeding moms out there!

It’s amazing what patience, persistence and most importantly, prayer can miraculously do. I do still experience fleeting moments of sadness or negativity. But in these times, I’m now better equipped to face the struggle. Each time I look down at Isaac’s beautiful face, I’m reminded that it’s all totally worth it. Pardon the euphemism, but I believe the juice is definitely worth the squeeze. I love being a mom and am reassured that this most amazing gig is meant for me.

The home stretch

For those who may be curious, I’ll take this moment to fill you in on my progress now that I’m one day away from my estimated due date. Yesterday was my weekly check up with my OB/GYN. For whatever reason, I had high blood pressure and was ordered to get additional blood work done along with a sonogram. The doc needed reassurance that I was okay health-wise and that this baby boy wasn’t much bigger than what she had expected. Praise God, my blood work came back perfectly normal and my high blood pressure dropped dramatically after some rest and relaxation in Triage. The sonogram estimated Baby Isaac to weigh in at 8lbs 5oz…he’s a big boy!

Although I’m nearly 40 weeks in, this baby has not engaged himself for birth…at all! He’s still “way up high” but constantly kicks mommy like he insists on coming out. So what can we conclude from all this? He wants to come out but there’s not much room for him to make his big entrance.

Before leaving the hospital, I was told to pray and discuss my options with my husband and my mom, who is an RN and has the skinny on these types of medical predicaments. After a lot of talking and prayers lifted up for baby and me, I have decided to schedule an elective Cesarean on Valentine’s Day. Not only is my gut telling me to opt for a C-section, but it really is what’s best for baby.

But I must admit, I always dreamed of having my first child by experiencing all of the joys and pain accompanied by full-fledged labor and delivery. I envisioned enduring a 17-hour labor after public humiliation when my water breaks at the mall. I always thought I would have a “normal” delivery since I’ve been blessed with a “healthy” pregnancy from start until now. But God has other plans and I’m left to accept what is best for baby although it’s not my most favored option.

All in all, the outcome will be the same. My husband and I will finally get to meet our little (big) boy in a few days and we’ll finally get to try our hand in parenting. It’s crazy to think I’m going to be a mommy very soon. All I ask are for your prayers and to stay tuned for more as the rest of this exciting story unfolds…

Six-Word Memoir

A few days ago, Our Daily Bread Devotional referenced SMITH magazine, an online community that “celebrates the joy of storytelling.” SMITH asked their readers to write six-word memoirs to best capture their lives. They received thousands of responses with 6-word stories ranging from light-hearted comments like “Sweet wife, good sons—I’m rich” to the more brutal “Sixty. Still haven’t forgiven my parents.”

What is your 6-word memoir on your life? Mine would be one of the following:
- Truly blessed – couldn’t ask for more.
- Personal mistakes yield great lessons learned.
- My God made all this possible.

It’s now February and it’s crazy to think we’re going to have a baby in a matter of weeks…or maybe even in a matter of days! We’ve been so blessed over the course of this pregnancy, and I’m forever grateful to have such a healthy experience these past 9months. But I’m doing my best to look past the 45+ pounds I’ve gained and all of the water retention that makes me look like a bloated pregnant lady so soon to pop.



I just wanted to take the time to thank the special people who helped make all of our three memorable and enjoyable baby showers such a success. My husband and I have enjoyed three consecutive baby showers in the past three weeks. I have never eaten so much cake in such a short amount of time…but hey, I ain’t complaining.







Thanks also to everyone who showered us with such great baby gifts. Isaac is truly well equipped with the essentials and has more adorable outfits than I can keep up with. What I will remember most from all of these baby showers is the effort that everyone put into making each event a special one for us and for our guests. Many thanks to you all very special people in our lives. We feel so blessed to have your love and support. Thanks for everything! As in my 6-word memoir and thanks to you all I feel, “truly blessed – couldn’t ask for more."

A new way to start my day

I attended an all-day MK educational/work event yesterday. With a fresh start to a new year, I’ve been encouraged to experiment with my daily walk with God. I now want to make little tweaks to my daily routine to positively affect my livelihood in a HUGE way.

Although my husband and I have disciplined ourselves to include daily devotionals a part of our lives, I want my own discipline for me. My MK director encouraged me to wake up each morning thanking God for 10 blessings in my life. Yesterday, I wrote out a simple list of 10 things I’m grateful for, whether they’re material, spiritual or just personal items, I was sure to list them. My list of thanks included the following (in no particular rank or order):
1. My husband
2. My spiritual life
3. My spiritual wisdom
4. Our house
5. Our car
6. Our puppies
7. The health of our pregnancy
8. Our friends
9. Our family
10. My overall great life

It took only seconds to think of 10 things to be grateful for at that moment. My New Year’s resolution is to start off the day with a positive attitude so I can always expect great things to come. I have it in me to be the infectious positive influence to those around me. I could never see myself as being the killjoy in the group. I want to leave any room satisfied knowing that I may have brightened up someone’s day by just being happy and grateful for the blessings in my life. I have the wisdom to know that in order to start my day with “positive expectancy,” I must start from a place of gratitude. As Ed Young Jr., the emphatic preacher at Fellowship Church in Grapevine, TX suggests, I too strongly believe negative people are smaller than positive people in the grand scheme of things. But sometimes there are those influential people in our lives who seem to bring the cloud of darkness into every situation.

For instance, there was someone who was once a part of my church and social life. Although she’s been blessed with beauty, talent, creativity and outgoing charm, she seems to ALWAYS be miserable. Every time she walks into a room, instead of cheerfully greeting those she’s around, she dumps her ongoing struggles and problems. She can’t just be happy, and I can’t understand it. Every sigh she releases is one of frustration, disappointment and/or disgust with all things or people in her life. It’s as if her mission is to bring the storm rather than infect people with positivity. I wish I had the guts to ask her, why would you want to be the negative interruption in people’s lives? If you really care and love those around you, why dump your problems and frustrations on them? Does that show that you truly care and love them?

As my MK director so beautifully stated, “When you want more, you must be grateful for where you are now.” Positive expectancy is an area of attitude change that brings about abundance in life. We all want more and I’m sure we all feel we deserve more in our own right. Some of us work towards achieving more by surrounding ourselves with people who think bigger than us. Others surround themselves with people they aspire to one day be like. Purposely surrounding yourself in positively influential surroundings is a means of striving for positive expectancy, I believe. As I’ve stated in a previous blog post back on July 12, 2010, we are where we are by the choices we make. Why not choose to be positive? Why not be the person that infects positivity that leaves a lasting impression? It’s totally do-able, but only if we choose to be happy for where we currently are and purposely begin from a place of gratitude. Would you agree that we all have so many things to be thankful for?

But it’s so much easier said than done. In fact, this morning I already began complaining with my fears and worries about bringing home baby. We have our marriage and careers, 3 dogs and a house to care for. It’s daunting to think about juggling these while trying to figure out how to raise a child. I’m plagued with doubts… how am I ever going to learn how to care for this baby when I’ve got 3 yapping pups and other important priorities surrounding me? It’s hard enough at the beginning…but I’ve already set expectations that it’s going to be a nightmare at first. So what if it is? I’m a strong woman blessed with a huge support system. There is no reason I should dread how hard the first few weeks with baby could potentially be. Envisioning the stress and frustration at this point already negates my intention to live by positive expectancy. Why can’t I just expect that God will guide me as I find a way and make a way?

It’s so much easier said than done! But at this point, all I can do is trust that through my faith in the Lord and by positively expecting things could actually work out for the better, already my attitude can bring about a HUGE change in me. Coming from a place of gratitude for my support system and faith will set me up for living each day with positive expectancy. As I’ve stated in the beginning of this long post, that’s exactly my point!

Six more weeks to go!

Not only is it hard to believe that it’s now 2011, but it’s surreal to know I have just six more weeks to go in my pregnancy. Baby Isaac is due mid-February, and I love telling people I will have a baby next month! I don’t know what feeling overwhelms me more – excitement or absolute terror. Anyone who knows me is familiar with my rather low threshold for pain. How am I ever going to pop out a baby? But on the flip side, all I can think about is bringing a new life into this world. I can’t wait to see my husband as a father. I can’t wait to meet my baby boy for the first time. Already this baby is so loved. We’re all so eager to finally meet him.

I must admit, it makes my day when strangers congratulate me on my baby bump or receiving special treatment from passersby everywhere I go. Clearly, it’s hard for me to do simple things on my own. There have been so many nice people along the way who offer a hand to a pregnant woman on her feet. I get so tickled when people take notice of me noticing other toddlers from a distance. I’ve even had some businessman at Starbucks ask me if I’m ready for what’s ahead after watching me watch a mom with her baby boy.

Just before New Year’s my husband and I ate at our neighborhood Cheddars – I had a specific craving. In the parking lot, we both went gaga over this precious little girl who had to be 3 or 4 years old. She was too adorable for words. She was a spunky one. Funny enough, her family was seated directly across from us. Each time I could secretly admire her lovable spirit, I’d glance over to see her enjoying her food.

Just after we paid our bill, we got up from the table to leave and I noticed as I stood up, the little girl looked directly at me as if she’d been trying to get my attention. When she noticed that I noticed her, she gave me the biggest, warmest smile I’ve ever seen. This precious little girl completely made by day by flashing such a beautiful and genuine smile. My husband noticed and as we exited the restaurant, he leaned over to me and said, “Well that was the cutest thing ever!”

She warmed my heart and another fleeting moment overwhelmed my soul. Once again, I couldn’t wait to be a mommy. She was just so precious and so full of energy. I appreciated how she didn’t shy away when I smiled back. In fact, she just smiled bigger! It was a nice way to end the evening and I know I’ll never forget the way that little one warmed my heart so. Man…I’m SO ready to have this baby!